Hackwatchers are busy guessing whose bum will replace Rebekah (Wade) Brooks’ in the editor’s chair at Britain’s leading daily Shag-Rag, the Sun when she slithers a few feet further up the greasy pole that is News International.

          Most think deputy Dominic Mohan, but the Murdochs (Rumplechops and Young James) haven’t said. An announcement is due next month when the Testarossa goes upstairs, and there is speculation that Mohan will soon be asked to join his (elder) boss in Miami, to paddle on Palm Beach and be told the great news (as Piers Morgan has said he was).

          Luckily for Mohan – former editor of the paper’s pathetic Bizarre showbiz page – journalistic quality matters very little at the Sun these days, as long as you have a hot line to the inmates of the Big Brother house, which seems so far to have provided Mohan’s journalistic vertex, and a lot of inaccurate and trivial twaddle for which anyone with even a small brain wouldn’t give a poodle’s pillock.  

          He’s hot favourite according to Paddy Power, who offer him at odds on 4/11.

Fifth in the betting, below Victoria Newton (Head of Features),  Chris Pharo (Head of News) and Richard Wallace (Editor of the Daily Mirror), is my favourite, ex-Screws editor, Andy Coulson. After his laughably unconvincing display of innocence in front of the Culture Media Sport select committee last month, in the wake of further revelations about the Screws’ phone-hacking, it’s unlikely that even the loyal David Cameron will feel it necessary to retain his services. Now that he’s been seen by millions on  TV, dissembling so vigorously and obviously, his credibility is surely too tainted for a serious contender for government to keep him on.

          So, Andy will need a job; Rupert likes him – he took the rap by resigning for something about which he says he knew nothing (bit odd?) – and, as his performance in front of the committee showed, he’s quick on his feet and Teflon coated (so far). And he’s always got on well with the Titian Tigress, who would become his immediate boss.

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